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About Our Love

About Our Love: Lindsay & Mylin’s Artsy California Love

Written by Lindsay Stokes Kennedy

I first met my wife, MyLin, at Bible study.  I had just moved to town and was working very hard to deny my sexuality like a good Christian girl.  Needless to say, that didn’t really work.  It wasn’t love at first sight.  She approached me on a friend level and slowly but surely something else grew.

Our First Date

Honestly, I’m not sure that I can recount a first date.  Everything with us happened so organically and we grew in love.  She was my friend first, so it very easily could’ve been a trip to the grocery store or to get ice cream or to a movie.

We Knew We Were In Love When …

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After about five months of dating, we felt in love but never said it.  We were in very different places in our lives and I ended up moving back to Los Angeles and left her in Northern California.

Life got crazy and some time passed and we eventually ended up realizing we were meant to be together so she drove down to Los Angeles with my best friend and brought me home.  I was committed to her that day.

Why We Got Married

Marriage means different things to different people, but for me it was about expressing where she stands to me.  I see marriage as the highest level of commitment. It was about confirming that, besides God, no one would present higher to me.

Our Wedding Day

black lesbian couple mylin and lindsay kiss at their wedding

My wedding day was insane.  Our wedding started at 8 p.m. on New Year’s Eve, December 31, 2014 and we were married at midnight on January 1, 2015.  We were united in our 2-bedroom apartment with about 30 of our closest friends and family members.

 

One of the most memorable parts of that day was my baby brother walked me down the aisle (and by aisle, I mean out of the guest bathroom, through the living room and out onto the patio).

The MOST memorable of course, would be marrying my best friend.

What I Love About My Wife

My wife is the best person that I know.  Aside from her road rage, she is literally the most open and empathetic person that I know.  She is completely opposite of myself. She is calm and kind and motherly.  I still get surprised some days.

How We Got Past …

Well our hardest obstacle has probably been the sacrifices I had to adjust to in terms of raising a child.  My wife has a son from a previous relationship and I’ve had to become a mother overnight and find tender pieces of myself that simply weren’t there.  It’s what happens with marriage though.

 

Compromise is necessary and if you have the same end goal and the same priorities, then you can get past them if the love is real.

 

Our Family

black lesbian family picture two mommies son and a dog

We have a son from my wife’s previous marriage.  He’s a boy genius named Kameron and he definitely teaches me to be a better person every day.  We want to have two more girls and we’re hoping to start next year.  It’s important to me that I share the love and wisdom that my wife has given me with a life that we choose to create together.

 

Our Secret Weapon

black lesbian couple talking at outdoor cafe

I know it’s cliché but I think it’s communication is what keeps our relationship strong.  We talk about literally everything.  I can’t think of anything that my wife doesn’t know about me or about the things that are important to me.

There is a way to be honest without being hurtful, and in order to have open communication in your relationship, that is something that needs to be mastered.  

Otherwise, you’re going to keep things to yourself to spare their feelings, or you’re being careless with them.  I never want to do either.


Lindsay (27) and MyLin (29) are the wife-and-wife design duo that make up the StokesKennedy art and design brand. They are based in Compton, California. Follow them on IG @ StokesKennedy

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Article written by:

Zamara Perri is the founder and editor of the Black Lesbian Love Lab blog. She is a proud u-hauler who loves mangoes, cats, reading, cooking for her awesome partner and writing about some of the challenges and joys of black lesbian relationships.

Join the discussion

  1. Chanelle Flowers

    I love this! I totally understand. I was blessed to have my best friend at my fingertips when I because single again. She is my star. I love that fact we can talk about any and everything at any given moment. The statement I heard that if you have sneak or get out of bed to speak to your best friend, then you are with the wrong person. I totally understand and am most grateful to realize it finally. I was trying to make something out of nothing, then I just got tired and really thought about what I have been doing. She was there with opened arms. So about 16 years and 2 kids (hers) later, our bound is still growing and never wavered. I love my new family! Blessings to you and yours!

  2. David

    Simply put, you two are beaUtiful!! Love you!!

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