Celebrating black lesbian love and relationships!

The Exes and Hoes

WakingUpLovelyLogoThe bliss of being in a new relationship is wonderful. The birds chirp louder, the weather always seems to be perfect, and you know every time your phone rings the sweet, sexy voice of your new honey will be on the other end. Heart flutter city!!!!! Yaaasssssss, I love it. The smell of a new relationship is like the smell of fresh-baked cookies, everyone knows when they are ready… even your exes. I love the way people get all in their feelings when you get into a new relationship because when you were single your ex wasn’t even thinking about you. But, now when you’re in a good committed relationship, all these exes and hoes want to come out the woods.

Engagement ringWhy is it when you see a ring on my finger you want to say, “I would have gotten you a ring too”? Well mother curse word you didn’t. It seems like women can see a ring from miles away. My honey’s ex saw mine. I feel like as soon as she put it on my finger, her ex started sending “I miss you” texts, started to accidently send texts like “Let’s get married” and then send one back saying “Oops that wasn’t meant for you.” Really? These chicks know exactly the moment the person they have done wrong or kept on the side has officially moved on.

I cannot take it! Why now? Why try to make me question my relationship and my choices because you decided you want me now? Nope honey, you lose. People fail to realize that you can’t keep a good girl down. You cheat on her and you lose her. You date her and keep her simmering on that back burner too long and you lose her. You keep her on the side just in case and you lose her. You cannot keep a good girl down. And so why are you popping up now? Do you think you can treat her better now than before? You should have thought of that when you had her and was treating her like crap. I know from firsthand experience that, “you never know a good thing until it’s gone.”

It was best said in the film “Why did I get Married?” directed by Tyler Perry: “Good luck with your 20.” I love that line. For those who have never seen the movie and don’t know what it means, here you go… No one can ever be 100% of what you want the majority of the time. You will get a good 80% but never 100. So some people may go out looking for that 20% that is missing in their 80% lover not knowing that the 20% that they just found is only 20% and nothing more. When that discovery is made, they want to come back home with “I’m sorry,” but now it is too late.

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Article written by:

Zamara Perri

Zamara Perri is the founder and editor of the Black Lesbian Love Lab blog. She loves black love and loves mangoes, cats, reading, cooking and writing about some of the challenges and joys of black lesbian relationships.

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